Also known as Old Dog New Tricks and  yadda yadda yadda.

So as most of you know, or maybe you don't IF YOU WEREN'T PAYING ATTENTION, I was an accountant up until a few years ago. Growing up as an artist I always thought if you do it for a job you'll eventually learn to hate it. Because that's what jobs were to me growing up. Something you HAVE to do. It never occurred to me until I starting doing art for pay that it's something you GET to do. Doing art for a living is a privilege not something owed to me because I draw a lot.

I did a bunch of freelance stuff while I was still an accountant, and a LOT of it...okay most of it I was never paid for and it never saw the light of day. But that's the way it goes. I'm not bitter. I learned a lot from it all. Then about 4 years ago I started getting paid for it. On a regular basis. I was almost making a living off of private commissions alone, but I wanted to do more. I had gotten a taste for the glee of working as a professional artist full time and it made me work harder and learn more. I finally started reading more books about art. Teaching myself new things as well as learning from my growing group of art friends. And eventually I had the gall to hit up an artist/director whom I held in very very high regards. Steven E Gordon. He's an amazing man with INFINITE patience and kindness. I swear he's one of the greatest men in the business. I told him I was green(inexperienced for you those of you picturing Matt-Hulk...mmm Matt-Hulk. That would be rad) and that I wanted to storyboard at some point. If he knew of anyone willing to take on a low level boarding artist I'd appreciate it. To my complete surprise he offered to give me a chance under him as a board artist. I lept at the chance, tripped over my laces and fell face down in the pit of despair over having not been renewed after boarding for my one episode.

Steven did an amazing job teaching me and guiding me, but I was so stuck in comic book sequentials I couldn't figure out how to do the things he was teaching me. My shortcomings made his job harder and so I totally accepted that they couldn't use me after that episode.

Doesn't mean I wasn't sad to have failed at my first full time art job. I was. This ninja tried to kill it and ended up falling on my shuriken and my keys. So I languished for about 6 months after that gig was up trying to find new work. I ended up going back to accounting for one brief stint (Hey I got to go to Hawai'i for 3 weeks on that job, so suck it!) Then I got wind from a pal about a position opening up at Neopets.

The rest as they say is history. Well I guess it's history. It's actually only about 2.3 years now since I was hired so is that really hiiiistory? Like in the deep booming voice through the halls of museums? Or more like history chimed in a blog about some tween talking about her extensive background in life (bleeeech).

In any case, I've kinda thrived here and I really have appreciated the artistic push my co-workers have given me. It also helps working alongside some of my best friends mwahahahaha.

But there comes a moment when you realize you've gotten too comfortable and you try new things. So I've been sending out portfolios to more studios and have been getting similar rejections all around. "Well you're a little older for your skill level than we'd like and it'd be easier to hire a younger person who will have the training from art school than trying to train someone older who's set in their ways."

The truth is, I'm not set in my ways, I'm only 30(almost 31) years old and I don't consider that old in ANY form. But I see the business point of view on it. Why TRAIN someone to do a job when someone younger who paid for their own training in art school can do it.  Makes sense on paper.

But here's the thing. I never went to art school. The only art classes I took were a couple in high school where you make a papier machet boot or something but never learned about art. That's it. Since then I've been teaching myself or learning from friends.  I never got a chance to know what's out there artistically and honestly never knew where to look. My generation didn't have the internet growing up so we didn't have that resource to find artists or even art online.  We only had art history books and what we could find at the library.

So at the end of the day, my skills and knowledge really ARE lacking for someone my age who works professionally as an artist. What does this all boil down to? I've got to stop trying to eek my way through into better skill levels, fighting against the tide of my own ignorance and actually go out and learn something.

With that said, I just wanted to make sure everyone knew that even when you're 'old' and jaded you're never too old to have revelations about yourself, your artwork and your direction in life. I'm making a difference in myself now by going back to class (for the first time). I'll be taking classes in storyboarding, character design and animation over the next year or two and hopefully this'll open a new door for me somewhere at some time and I'll be able to report back with a new success.

Maybe you're an over 20's person like me still trying to figure out how to make this job work for you rather than just living paycheck to paycheck like me.  And I hope in the very least you realize from this that you're not  alone. There are a bunch of us out there still trying to claw our way out of the bowels of obscurity, past the lower intestines of apathy, and over the pile of rectal corn kernels that somehow find their way into every movement despite not having eaten corn for months and into the light of day, shining down upon us with a gleaming smile of victory in our pursuit of bigger and better.

Basically...we'll stop wallowing in poop and start driving nicer cars.

Good luck all.